chapter -II
CHAPTER II.
Of Mr Joseph Andrews, his birth, parentage, education, and
great endowments; with a word or two concerning ancestors.
Mr Joseph Andrews, the hero of our ensuing history, was
esteemed to be the only son of Gaffar and Gammer Andrews, and brother to the
illustrious Pamela, whose virtue is at present so famous. As to his ancestors,
we have searched with great diligence, but little success; being unable to
trace them farther than his great-grandfather, who, as an elderly person in the
parish remembers to have heard his father say, was an excellent cudgel-player.
Whether he had any ancestors before this, we must leave to the opinion of our
curious reader, finding nothing of sufficient certainty to rely on. However, we
cannot omit inserting an epitaph which an ingenious friend of ours hath
communicated:—
Stay, traveller, for underneath this pew
Lies fast asleep that merry man Andrew:
When the last day's great sun shall gild the skies,
Then he shall from his tomb get up and rise.
Be merry while thou canst: for surely thou
Shalt shortly be as sad as he is now.
The words are almost out of the stone with antiquity. But it
is needless to observe that Andrew here is writ without an s, and is, besides,
a Christian name. My friend, moreover, conjectures this to have been the
founder of that sect of laughing philosophers since called Merry-andrews.
To waive, therefore, a circumstance which, though mentioned
in conformity to the exact rules of biography, is not greatly material, I
proceed to things of more consequence. Indeed, it is sufficiently certain that
he had as many ancestors as the best man living, and, perhaps, if we look five
or six hundred years backwards, might be related to some persons of very great
figure at present, whose ancestors within half the last century are buried in
as great obscurity. But suppose, for argument's sake, we should admit that he
had no ancestors at all, but had sprung up, according to the modern phrase, out
of a dunghill, as the Athenians pretended they themselves did from the earth,
would not this autokopros 2 have been justly entitled to all the praise arising
from his own virtues? Would it not be hard that a man who hath no ancestors
should therefore be rendered incapable of acquiring honour; when we see so many
who have no virtues enjoying the honour of their forefathers? At ten years old
(by which time his education was advanced to writing and reading) he was bound
an apprentice, according to the statute, to Sir Thomas Booby, an uncle of Mr
Booby's by the father's side. Sir Thomas having then an estate in his own
hands, the young Andrews was at first employed in what in the country they call
keeping birds. His office was to perform the part the ancients assigned to the
god Priapus, which deity the moderns call by the name of Jack o' Lent; but his
voice being so extremely musical, that it rather allured the birds than
terrified them, he was soon transplanted from the fields into the dog-kennel,
where he was placed under the huntsman, and made what the sportsmen term
whipper-in. For this place likewise the sweetness of his voice disqualified
him; the dogs preferring the melody of his chiding to all the alluring notes of
the huntsman, who soon became so incensed at it, that he desired Sir Thomas to
provide otherwise for him, and constantly laid every fault the dogs were at to
the account of the poor boy, who was now transplanted to the stable. Here he
soon gave proofs of strength and agility beyond his years, and constantly rode
the most spirited and vicious horses to water, with an intrepidity which
surprized every one. While he was in this station, he rode several races for
Sir Thomas, and this with such expertness and success, that the neighbouring
gentlemen frequently solicited the knight to permit little Joey (for so he was
called) to ride their matches. The best gamesters, before they laid their
money, always inquired which horse little Joey was to ride; and the bets were
rather proportioned by the rider than by the horse himself; especially after he
had scornfully refused a considerable bribe to play booty on such an occasion.
This extremely raised his character, and so pleased the Lady Booby, that she
desired to have him (being now seventeen years of age) for her own footboy.
Joey was now preferred from the stable to attend on his
lady, to go on her errands, stand behind her chair, wait at her tea-table, and
carry her prayer-book to church; at which place his voice gave him an
opportunity of distinguishing himself by singing psalms: he behaved likewise in
every other respect so well at Divine service, that it recommended him to the
notice of Mr Abraham Adams, the curate, who took an opportunity one day, as he
was drinking a cup of ale in Sir Thomas's kitchen, to ask the young man several
questions concerning religion; with his answers to which he was wonderfully
pleased.
Footnote 2: In English, sprung from a dunghill. (return)